copyright Judy Silverstein 2009
used by permission
pain is a gift!
it hurts. it scrapes our
egos and hearts against rock-
hard boundaries. but...
it forces us to tilt our eyes away
from ourselves to others. and
ultimately, toward the face of
God.
pain kneads in us a softening
of our rigidity. our criticisms.
our wilful bent to define our own
journey. leaving God on the sidelines.
believing ourselves far more adept
than He at putting the pieces together.
i have never marched in
the band of suffering with joy and
acceptance. in time, i start kicking and
screaming. i go from shock to an immed-
iate sense of rebellion and fear. believing
that God needs my help to peel away
this claustrophobic tightening of what i
want vs. His will of defined hardship.
i always think of brock, my second born.
standing in the door of the laundry room
where i was folding clean clothes. he had
just returned from kindergarten.
mommy,
someone said something mean
to me today.
really?
my face looked sad.
that must have really hurt
your feelings.
it did.
i folded this five year old
little wonder into my arms.
brock, life is sometimes mean
and hard, but Jesus always, in time,
fixes everything.
i am just now really coming out of
years in the wilderness. and silence.
always writing and speaking publicly
that darkness comes, BUT Jesus never
leaves us there forever. that we will always
laugh again. the sun will diffuse the
darkness. yet, this wilderness felt like
forever.
stop the pain.
turn off the sun, moon. the stars.
close all the stores. tell the policemen
to go home. paint the windows black.
today,
again, i promise you that pain is
a gift. it purifies our souls. gives God
a chance to prove Himself: that love
ALWAYS wins. miracles ARE raised
out of ashes. we can really appreciate
the gifts He has saved for us only if we
have lived with pain.
take pain's hand.
make her your friend.
believe....always...that darkness
does NOT last forever.
today,
as i read your loving comments
on facebook and my website, i
have tears. your love warms my
spirit where wounds once lived.
Jesus is my Song.
the ONLY One who can paint
beauty and purpose in our lives
if we embrace the pain, and wait
for Him to create the sunrise.
dance with me.
take my hand. i love you.
remember that God's
love binds us together.
and our acceptance of
suffering ultimately brings
God's brand new, fresh
tomorrows.
"Dear friends, do not be surprised
at the painful trials you are suffering,
as though something strange is
happening to you.
But rejoice that you participate
in the sufferings of Christ,
so that you may be overjoyed
when His glory is revealed."
~ I Peter 4:12-13 (NIV)
It scrapes our egos ... ouch! I've read all of Ann's books - years ago. LOVE HER! Such a gifted writer!
ReplyDeletePain is usually not welcome, but it can be a blessing. Without it, I would not have gotten pregnant, since I had serious endometriosis, and I would not have my children. Pain warns us that all is not right. It tells us to visit the doctor. It leads us to the Great Physician.
ReplyDeleteAnn, at just a young age a missionary couple gave me all your books. I read them all and learned so much. Your life speaks volumes to me and this blog you just penned brings tears to my eyes. Now I am twenty one and truly believe that God does heal our pains and hurts. I would love to meet you someday and have a coffee and pour our hearts. I just know we would be kindred spirits. You are a dear friend, even if I don't know you... but I know that one day we will walk the streets of Heaven and you will see all the people you blessed down here! Just like you did for a little girl like me. God loves you and so do I! Thank you for your life of faith!
ReplyDeleteAnn,
ReplyDeleteYou and I must be close to the same age. I remember reading your books years ago. I was pleasantly surprised when a couple gave our daughter (then a teenager - she is now 21)your books. After she devoured your books, we saw her life transformed before our very eyes. She wanted to bring Jesus to her generation. Mothers often ask me how our daughter came to have such a vibrant faith. I always tell them it was through Ann Kiemel and Amy Carmichael's books that our daughter fell in love with Jesus. ;-) I just wanted to thank you for leaving eternal footprints in our souls.
I see the "SON" in your eyes,
Dixie
I cried reading this.
ReplyDeletePain.
You Get It.
Articulation, I'm so glad for your gift!
"brock, sometimes life is mean
and hard, but Jesus always, in time,fixes everything."
"today,
again, i promise you that pain is
a gift. it purifies our souls. gives God
a chance to prove Himself: that love
ALWAYS wins. miracles ARE raised
out of ashes. we can really appreciate
the gifts He has saved for us only if we
have lived with pain.
take pain's hand.
make her your friend.
believe....always...that darkness
does NOT last forever."
So glad God is the great choreographer of the dance even in the pain....creating beauty....creating tears....creating oneness.