ann kiemel

it was one of those flawless

days. june 7, 1981,

the day will and i married.

a sunday afternoon, my favorite

day of the week. a large, old

church across from the boston commons.

my holy father,

a pastor for fifty years, 

married us...and raymond

berry, will's football hero...

the all-time great, wide receiver

for the baltimore colts, walked me

down the aisle. a choir of ghetto

children preceded me down the

aisle, singing.

today,

i understand why most

brides break into tears as they

start down the aisle. in our hearts,

we really mean to be married

for the duration of our lives. only

when you are getting married

do you understand how huge it

is, for better or worse, to give

yourself away...'til death.

before our wedding,

i never once asked will

how much money he made.

at that time in my life, i was

wealthy. many best-selling

books. a full staff. and...i

chose to sell my condo

on the atlantic waters in boston

to be completely committed

to will's life as a potato farmer.

i pray you will stick with me

through these blogs because

it is a story of love and rage and

pain....and finally, today, victory.

and victory didn't come when

will died 13 years ago, but

within the last year.

just painting around the edges.

a rough overview. large strokes

of glaring errors and massive

leaps of forgiveness. a door that might open ...

and suck enough air in to make the rooms of your

hearts grow. and soften. and

blow the enemy out the side window.

if will and i never talked money

or budgeting before walking

down the aisle, and i never saw

one penny of his income for years,

you can imagine how we started.

and though i utterly believed this

was the man for me, i had

never learned to love myself so

how could i genuinely love anyone

else?

i will do my best

to show you what it's taken

for God to still be teaching the

children and me that love can

live inspite of harrowing obstacles.

with much prayer and love.

and hoping you had a beautiful

thanksgiving.