Saturday, November 3

Friday night.
Panera's.
asus computer. I like it!
Jesus keeps providing for me
through you. glorious. simply amazing.

it automatically capitalizes things,
which I don't appreciate. as you know.
will have to work on this. fix it.

next week, I go to the private, liberal arts
university from which I graduated. to receive
what is considered a coveted award. I really
don't feel worthy of adulation. certainly not for my
writing because that is a gift that is ALL about God.
not me. please pray for me.

my new book, God willing:
"everything I have learned about the heart of God."
stories from my life that have revealed the magnificent,
beautiful heart of God. I have had to live this long to even
begin to fully consider speaking about Jesus and His heart.

the collaborator (a first...to help put my style in a way acceptable
to the publishers who want my next book, but all wanted me to
'change' the way I put words on paper) is an author of 40 novels.
she started reading me at 14 years of age. says she read "i'm running
to win" over 40 times. she's humble and dear, and we are going to convene
at jan's house in sacramento. and none of us feels capable. the best sign.
her name is tracey bateman. maybe you've read her?

yes, billy (one of my blog commenters), there is a huge difference,
I think, between "heroes" and "idols". and I don't believe I qualify for
either. every day, I stare weakness in the face. every day, I crawl through
the cloud of doubt and insecurity to the radiant, shining Son of clarity and
strength, Who disregards all i'm not because of what He can do with ALL
He is.

blow the clouds away, Lord.
blow the doubts away.
that we may be light and kindness and love
and compassion wherever we go today.
amen. amen

2 comments:

  1. Ann,

    Survivors are ordinary, broken, wounded, & scarred people who have made it through horrible circumstances by the love & grace of an extraordinary God.

    Next month, on the 16th, will be my 14th "cancerversary." I was newly divorced with a 10 year old daughter to raise on my own when I found out I had a 12 cm. inoperable tumor behind my left lung. My daughter's father pretty much told me on the phone, "Well, too bad for you. I'm going on with my life - my wife is having a baby." If you had told me then that I would survive the lymphoma, live to see my daughter grow up to become a beautiful young lady & be a part of a wonderful & supportive church family -- I would have laughed in your face. But it happened. The heart damage caused by the chemo has put into perspective that it's NEVER been about us -- it's ALWAYS been about GOD & how awesome, glorious, & amazing HE IS.

    We are survivors - just ordinary people who love & serve an extraordinary God.

    Praying for you,
    Rennie

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  2. I would be happy to see another book of yours come out. I am definitely praying for you and also about you having to go for that award. Maybe if you see it as coming from the Lord and not man it will be easier for you. Ann.. you're still changing your world and i believe that you are going through all of this so that you will be built up in the Lord. He never brings us to the edge of the cliff just to through us off... He holds out his arms and teaches us to fly!See ya tomorrow!
    Godspeed!

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