Friday, October 12

Jesus lives in a VERY big house.
with walls of windows, and redwoods
growing outside. those magnificent
trees that look as if they are brushing
the sky.

and somehow,
it just feels as if we all live together
there. you, my fellow warriors, and i.
we belong. we are bound by God's incredible
crush of love. all of us broken, but putting one foot
in front of the other on hard days, and once in awhile,
almost flying. with the wind at our backs, and the joy
and encouragement of each other singing in our ears.

YOU have helped ME so much.
all your love and beautiful thoughts.
AND the money you've sent to help for a
new, used car. i am so excited. i plan to go
to sacramento saturday, and have my brother-in-law
help me look. and i am just believing it will be.
yes, i am believing!!! and so excited.

my dear friends and neighbors,
who have allowed me to use one of
their cars every day, have roamed
around with me, seeing what we could find.

do you know what real grace is like?
well, you wait two-plus months for a car, and
you wait, and wait. and it is okay. but i know
when i get my own car, and don't feel i am
taking one of my neighbor's cars, i think it will
shock me at the tidal wave of relief and joy that
will come. grace is making it, and not realizing
HOW much God is helping us until the battle or
the need is won and met.

brandt had to wear an ankle monitor for three
months for stealing two little lighters at the drugstore.
as you know, when i found out, i called the police,
and he spent two nights in juvenile hall, and then
had the monitor put on so he could only go to
school. for my most social child, this was HUGE.
he never complained until the day they removed
the contraption from his ankle, and i was deluged
with his joy and gratitude and relief to have that
"thing" off. it had rubbed his ankle, and kept him
from friends. he tells me that is when he started
smoking. out his bedroom window, on the roof.
when i was running errands or out with the other
three boys. sigh.

grace is what carries us in terribly hard
times. we just don't realize HOW vast and
great it is until the specific battles are over.
when we look back, it is truly amazing all
the Lord does to carry us.

thank you all that helped on my car.
as soon as i find it, i'll announce it.
celebration is just around the corner.


  1. I totally understand about not having a car! My '92 Ford Tempo died 553 days ago from transmission problems (yes, I've been counting!) & since then I've had to depend on friends to take me to church & the store/pharmacy & the Access Express para-transit bus to take me to medical appointments & personal trips.

    Right now someone in my church wants to give me a '98 Toyota Camry but the rear brakes, struts & AC need to be fixed & the radiator needs to be replaced. There is also some cosmetic damage but the important thing is the engine is still good. This man approached the elders about it. They had a meeting & they voted that the church would pay for ALL the repairs & make it drivable for me!

    I forgot to mention that I'm disabled. (I'm a 14 year non-hodgkins lymphoma survivor. Four years ago I found out the chemo I had 14 years ago damaged the left side of my heart.) Owning a car meant independence. When my car died, it was as if the last shred of my independence was taken away from me. But during the last 553 days I've learned how to RECEIVE from people. I've always been a giver to others but have never been comfortable about receiving -- until now. It takes God's grace to receive from others as much as it does to give to others. Plus I've gotten to know the people in my church who gave me rides & they're now close friends, which wouldn't have happened if I'd had a car. So I share your anticipation of having your own car & pray that we won't forget the lessons learned while car-less.

    Rennie Auiler

  2. I totally know how difficult it is without a car. I had an Isusu Trooper that started having trouble starting. I went to get my new glasses and got stuck at the mall. Being a single parent, on social security, i had no one to help me tow it so i had to call a junk place and they came and took it and gave me $150.00 and my 10 year old son cried and we ended up getting a ride home from a complete stranger..but, then after two years i was able to get another car.... Yes.. it was awful but God's wonderful grace is sufficient.... it's the waiting that is the most difficult and wondering if "God is gonna come through". I am going through this thing now wondering "why is it so hard for me to trust God" and HE showed me that i have been having to do it all by myself and i am afraid of not being "in control"..Wow..what an eye opener! Anyway, Ann.. i know you will get the car that HE wants you to have .... Have a Blessed night...

  3. thank you for sharing your stories with me!