it was the craziest thing.
how it happened. like so many
moments in my life.
my first night home from dallas and brock's and my
incredible time together. maybe 3 a.m., and
i fly out of bed to go to the bathroom. so tired,
and suddenly crashing into something (my eyes were
still closed with sleep). crawled back into bed, and
didn't know until morning that the metal in the lamp
by my bed was completely bent, and the left side of my
rib cage was stabbing me with terrible pain.
in the mirror, i saw that my right arm was covered
in bruises and scratches. can you believe this? it's
completely different, but sort of like being hauled off to
jail with a dui when i can't even stand the smell of al-
cohol. these "happenings" lead me to places i've never
visited before.
after five days of horrible pain, i pick up
an order from my doctor to get x-rayed. i'm lazy with
things like this. going clear to the hospital. finding
the x-ray dept.. putting on a little, almost nothing
gown. all of it an irritation and intrusion.
at the desk where i am processed, a lady begins to
type my info. on a form. i had no idea that my
vocation is listed on all my paperwork,
and says i am a self-employed writer.
"what kind of books do you write?"
i smile. i never feel comfortable talking about my
writing. but i tell her the books are about the journeys of
my life. and how Jesus helps me....and others can relate
because life is life for ALL of us. that we are ALL broken,
and need the Lord.
she stops typing. removes her glasses, and looks at me.
"my mother was diagnosed with cancer the first of march, and
six days later, died. she was thrilled she was headed for Heaven
sometime soon. but i'm still not comprehending why a
loving God would do this. would take her and leave me here
to suffer such a loss."
"well," i say. "now i know why i am here today. it is NOT
about x-rays and a fractured rib. i was personally sent,
by God, to comfort you. to tell you that He is with you through
this enormous loss. that you are not overlooked in the crowds of
millions. the God of the universe cares and has plans to turn this
loss into something beautiful."
Jesus is meticulous when it comes to His children.
always watching. comforting. assisting. like the gush
of racing waters, so is His passion to lead us to higher places.
the next time you have an unwanted interruption in your life,
be ready for God's next assignment in your neighborhood.
it's called ADVENTURE!
As I read this post, I smiled to myself for so many reasons. One, this is what I loved about your writings when I first read them at 8 years old. You have instilled this into me. I no longer look at a cashier the same way. Every interaction, however quick, can be an assignment from God! Two, I love that God used your pain to bring you to a spot that you could love on another dear sister in pain. And not just these bruises, but the scars and wounds that have healed that sum up your story. He uses it all. Praise Him!! And thirdly, how are you? Did you injure anything we can pray for?
ReplyDeleteYesterday in my Counseling Youth and Families class we discussed grief.
ReplyDeleteWe talked about saying "I don't know" to someone and if that is enough.
You didn't say that. You spoke truth into that girl's life without trying to give an "answer" or fix anything.
I think you spoke beautifully.
I am so blessed by your stories because they mirror my life so much. I have always wanted to be where God has wanted me to be. So after the company I worked for for 16 years shutting down so I was out of work with a family of five and my wife not able to work; I was wondering why, but yet I knew that God had something for me. I have been back to work for a year now after a six month reflection time. I take care of computers for a Help Desk and I speak to many people throughout the day and most don't understand the smile on my face. I am most blesses as the person that I am working besides has a great need and I believe that God has sent me here to be an encouragement to him through this time of fight cancer. I'm not getting paid enough still to take care of the bills, but I am where He wants me. And He has filled me with joy.
ReplyDelete