Tuesday, June 26

first, i just want to thank all of you
for the incredibly loving and touching
words you send to me. i post my blogs
feeling so badly that i can't do better.

please know that as i read each one,
my heart is so touched. and i am amazed
that Jesus can take anything, and if He
puts His hand on it, it is transformed and
annointed. again, many blessings to you.

well, i did it again today.
i sinned like i do every other day.
oh, if i could just be perfect one day for
God. if my thoughts could always be
honorable. and my responses. if i could
only see people's hearts and NEVER
judge them by appearance or off-kilter

yes, truly Jesus died for me.
and all my imperfections and

jan called this morning. every morning
she awakens with a terrible fear that
she is dying, though she remains in
remission. every now and then, while
we are talking (and we do this every single
day...talk) she will start saying things
out of left field. completely different from
what we've been discussing. she's been
through so much, so i don't know if it is her
medication or sadness that draws her to

my sins creep out of my heart. not overt
emotions, but little pieces of irritation or
impatience. thoughts and words are so
powerful. cleansing or damning. careless
and selfish.

"there is a River that flows from Calvary..."
oh, River, flow. in me. my deepest parts.
wash me. that i can be "whiter than snow".


  1. thank you for continuing to speak from your heart here on your blog. you are so encouraging through sharing your ups and downs. I'm going through a rough time and am not sure of anything right now. But the one thing I hold onto, is GOD's love and the hope HE gives, that carries us through. the River......

  2. I think your posts are wonderful, each and every one! It means so much that you share your struggles and faults. Like sunnrae, I am also going through a rough time and not sure of anything beyond today. Although I prefer the old hymns instead of contemporary Christian music, "In Christ Alone" has been running through my head. YouTube has a beautiful video, complete with words. "In Christ alone my hope is found/He is my life, my strength, my song./This cornerstone this solid ground/Firm through the fiercest drought and storm."